EXPAT LIFE
When There’s No Word
for Where You Live
SUE BRATTLE
A Clear-Eyed Look at Expat Life from an Immigrant Worker
WHAT do you think of when I say the word “home”? The very first thought that comes into your head? It might be an easy question for many of you, but I’ve realised I find it pretty confusing these days.
So what has made me think about this? Well, firstly we’ve just had our 13th year anniversary since we left the UK. Secondly, we recently took a week’s break in Dubai, which was “home” to us for more than six years before we moved to Asia.
I’ve loved Dubai since our very first trip there, staying in the Oasis Beach Hotel which we later watched being demolished, and visiting the very early stages of several huge developments.
Fast-forward 20-odd years and my, how things have changed. So much, in fact, that on our visit last month I found it quite hard to find “my Dubai”. That “can do” energy is one of the things I love there, and undoubtedly is at the root of such quick and huge change. This time around, though, it seemed manic rather than ambitious.
However, it’s not just buildings that make a home, is it? It’s a sense of belonging, and I definitely didn’t feel I belonged in Dubai any longer. The problem is, I don’t belong in Hong Kong, either, and that’s where we live right now.
We haven’t been here long enough to qualify as permanent residents (PRs), which takes seven years, and this alienation hit me recently when the HK government gave HK$10,000 handouts to all PRs as some sort of band aid over the coronavirus crisis.
The reports of the handout made me realise our category is “immigrant workers”, a phrase that almost makes me embrace the “expat” label I’ve disliked since we left the UK in 2007. It implies a here today, gone tomorrow feeling that is, actually, beginning to creep in with me these days.
I never felt it in Dubai, but I think watching poor old Hong Kong go through the wringer for a year now (first the endless protests, now the virus) has made me feel more separated than joined as I gradually realise how little I know or fully understand about this city.
And now I’m watching from 6,000 miles away as the UK gets to grips with the virus, five or six weeks later than us. Suddenly it’s real to people we know in both countries and perhaps it has also taken this universal emergency to concentrate my mind on where is “home”.
We have a house in England, but we’ve had tenants who’ve lived there longer than we ever did. If we sold the house, then where would our home be? I’ve decided home is where I was born, which was a tiny village in Kent in England. Everywhere else is somewhere I live, but with that decision I have to accept very few privileges (I’m not a citizen), and no power (I don’t have the vote).
This feeling will get complicated in two years when we lose the vote in the UK, having been away for 15 years – but that’s the rule and I’ll face that when we get there.
In the meantime, I need a new word for the places we’ve lived in the past 13 years. “Home from home” doesn’t quite cut it, and “second home” implies we’ve been living in a stream of holiday cottages. The only thing in common among all the places we’ve lived is they’ve been apartments, not houses.
So I’m going to swallow my pride, use an American spelling and call them “stories” (us Brits call the floors in an apartment building “storeys”). Let’s face it, stories are one thing we’ve accumulated over the years and I’m hoping there are several more to come. It seems more honest to focus on experiences than grappling with where I fit into the scheme of things.
March 2020
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SHIMLA, QUEEN OF THE HILLS: Government officials once retreated to Shimla in the foothills of the Himalayas to escape India’s blazing hot summers. Now tourists make the same journey. READ MORE
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LET'S KEEP IN TOUCH!
EXPAT LIFE
When There’s No Word
for Where You Live
SUE BRATTLE
A Clear-Eyed Look at Expat Life from an Immigrant Worker
WHAT do you think of when I say the word “home”? The very first thought that comes into your head? It might be an easy question for many of you, but I’ve realised I find it pretty confusing these days.
So what has made me think about this? Well, firstly we’ve just had our 13th year anniversary since we left the UK. Secondly, we recently took a week’s break in Dubai, which was “home” to us for more than six years before we moved to Asia.
I’ve loved Dubai since our very first trip there, staying in the Oasis Beach Hotel which we later watched being demolished, and visiting the very early stages of several huge developments.
Fast-forward 20-odd years and my, how things have changed. So much, in fact, that on our visit last month I found it quite hard to find “my Dubai”. That “can do” energy is one of the things I love there, and undoubtedly is at the root of such quick and huge change. This time around, though, it seemed manic rather than ambitious.
However, it’s not just buildings that make a home, is it? It’s a sense of belonging, and I definitely didn’t feel I belonged in Dubai any longer. The problem is, I don’t belong in Hong Kong, either, and that’s where we live right now.
We haven’t been here long enough to qualify as permanent residents (PRs), which takes seven years, and this alienation hit me recently when the HK government gave HK$10,000 handouts to all PRs as some sort of band aid over the coronavirus crisis.
The reports of the handout made me realise our category is “immigrant workers”, a phrase that almost makes me embrace the “expat” label I’ve disliked since we left the UK in 2007. It implies a here today, gone tomorrow feeling that is, actually, beginning to creep in with me these days.
I never felt it in Dubai, but I think watching poor old Hong Kong go through the wringer for a year now (first the endless protests, now the virus) has made me feel more separated than joined as I gradually realise how little I know or fully understand about this city.
And now I’m watching from 6,000 miles away as the UK gets to grips with the virus, five or six weeks later than us. Suddenly it’s real to people we know in both countries and perhaps it has also taken this universal emergency to concentrate my mind on where is “home”.
We have a house in England, but we’ve had tenants who’ve lived there longer than we ever did. If we sold the house, then where would our home be? I’ve decided home is where I was born, which was a tiny village in Kent in England. Everywhere else is somewhere I live, but with that decision I have to accept very few privileges (I’m not a citizen), and no power (I don’t have the vote).
This feeling will get complicated in two years when we lose the vote in the UK, having been away for 15 years – but that’s the rule and I’ll face that when we get there.
In the meantime, I need a new word for the places we’ve lived in the past 13 years. “Home from home” doesn’t quite cut it, and “second home” implies we’ve been living in a stream of holiday cottages. The only thing in common among all the places we’ve lived is they’ve been apartments, not houses.
So I’m going to swallow my pride, use an American spelling and call them “stories” (us Brits call the floors in an apartment building “storeys”). Let’s face it, stories are one thing we’ve accumulated over the years and I’m hoping there are several more to come. It seems more honest to focus on experiences than grappling with where I fit into the scheme of things.
March 2020
RELATED
CARS: Cars are a big deal for some expats. Here’s what we’ve learned about them in our years living abroad – including where you need one, and where you don’t. READ MORE
TRIPS HOME: What happens when your home country, the place where you grew up and you know best, turns into somewhere that you go to on holiday? READ MORE
TROUBLED TIMES FOR EXPATS: Moving abroad can seem an idyllic prospect, but what happens when sudden upheavals or the inescapable realities of life intrude? READ MORE
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WELCOME TO OUR WORLD! Afaranwide’s home page – this is where you can find out about our latest posts and other highlights. READ MORE
TOP 10 ATTRACTIONS: Many of the world’s most popular tourists sites are closed because of the coronavirus crisis, but you can still visit them virtually while you’re self-isolating. READ MORE
SHIMLA, QUEEN OF THE HILLS: Government officials once retreated to Shimla in the foothills of the Himalayas to escape India’s blazing hot summers. Now tourists make the same journey. READ MORE
TEN THINGS WE LEARNED: Our up-to-the-minute guide to creating a website, one step at a time. The costs, the mistakes – it’s what we wish we’d known when we started blogging. READ MORE
TROUBLED TIMES FOR EXPATS: Moving abroad can seem an idyllic prospect, but what happens when sudden upheavals or the inescapable realities of life intrude? READ MORE
LET'S KEEP IN TOUCH!
When There’s No Word for Where You Live
A Clear-Eyed Look at Expat Life from an Immigrant Worker
SUE BRATTLE
WHAT do you think of when I say the word “home”? The very first thought that comes into your head? It might be an easy question for many of you, but I’ve realised I find it pretty confusing these days.
So what has made me think about this? Well, firstly we’ve just had our 13th year anniversary since we left the UK. Secondly, we recently took a week’s break in Dubai, which was “home” to us for more than six years before we moved to Asia.
I’ve loved Dubai since our very first trip there, staying in the Oasis Beach Hotel which we later watched being demolished, and visiting the very early stages of several huge developments.
Fast-forward 20-odd years and my, how things have changed. So much, in fact, that on our visit last month I found it quite hard to find “my Dubai”. That “can do” energy is one of the things I love there, and undoubtedly is at the root of such quick and huge change. This time around, though, it seemed manic rather than ambitious.
However, it’s not just buildings that make a home, is it? It’s a sense of belonging, and I definitely didn’t feel I belonged in Dubai any longer. The problem is, I don’t belong in Hong Kong, either, and that’s where we live right now.
We haven’t been here long enough to qualify as permanent residents (PRs), which takes seven years, and this alienation hit me recently when the HK government gave HK$10,000 handouts to all PRs as some sort of band aid over the coronavirus crisis.
The reports of the handout made me realise our category is “immigrant workers”, a phrase that almost makes me embrace the “expat” label I’ve disliked since we left the UK in 2007. It implies a here today, gone tomorrow feeling that is, actually, beginning to creep in with me these days.
I never felt it in Dubai, but I think watching poor old Hong Kong go through the wringer for a year now (first the endless protests, now the virus) has made me feel more separated than joined as I gradually realise how little I know or fully understand about this city.
And now I’m watching from 6,000 miles away as the UK gets to grips with the virus, five or six weeks later than us. Suddenly it’s real to people we know in both countries and perhaps it has also taken this universal emergency to concentrate my mind on where is “home”.
We have a house in England, but we’ve had tenants who’ve lived there longer than we ever did. If we sold the house, then where would our home be? I’ve decided home is where I was born, which was a tiny village in Kent in England. Everywhere else is somewhere I live, but with that decision I have to accept very few privileges (I’m not a citizen), and no power (I don’t have the vote).
This feeling will get complicated in two years when we lose the vote in the UK, having been away for 15 years – but that’s the rule and I’ll face that when we get there.
In the meantime, I need a new word for the places we’ve lived in the past 13 years. “Home from home” doesn’t quite cut it, and “second home” implies we’ve been living in a stream of holiday cottages. The only thing in common among all the places we’ve lived is they’ve been apartments, not houses.
So I’m going to swallow my pride, use an American spelling and call them “stories” (us Brits call the floors in an apartment building “storeys”). Let’s face it, stories are one thing we’ve accumulated over the years and I’m hoping there are several more to come. It seems more honest to focus on experiences than grappling with where I fit into the scheme of things.
March 2020
RELATED
CARS: Cars are a big deal for some expats. Here’s what we’ve learned about them in our years living abroad – including where you need one, and where you don’t. READ MORE
TRIPS HOME: What happens when your home country, the place where you grew up and you know best, turns into somewhere that you go to on holiday? READ MORE
TROUBLED TIMES FOR EXPATS: Moving abroad can seem an idyllic prospect, but what happens when sudden upheavals or the inescapable realities of life intrude? READ MORE
RECOMMENDED
WELCOME TO OUR WORLD! Afaranwide’s home page – this is where you can find out about our latest posts and other highlights. READ MORE
TOP 10 ATTRACTIONS: Many of the world’s most popular tourists sites are closed because of the coronavirus crisis, but you can still visit them virtually while you’re self-isolating. READ MORE
SHIMLA, QUEEN OF THE HILLS: Government officials once retreated to Shimla in the foothills of the Himalayas to escape India’s blazing hot summers. Now tourists make the same journey. READ MORE
TEN THINGS WE LEARNED: Our up-to-the-minute guide to creating a website, one step at a time. The costs, the mistakes – it’s what we wish we’d known when we started blogging. READ MORE
TROUBLED TIMES FOR EXPATS: Moving abroad can seem an idyllic prospect, but what happens when sudden upheavals or the inescapable realities of life intrude? READ MORE
I agree. I lived in Spain for nearly 3 years and then traveled for nearly a year. One of the reasons that I chose to return to the US was to create a sense of stability. I think that most people would call that sense of stability, home.
Yes, it can feel as though you’ve lost your footing. I know people who have lived abroad for 25+ years, while still keeping a house in their home country. But not quite ever wanting to leave their adopted country. It’s a complicated topic, that’s for sure.